


How I Love You

by Darkestri



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Hannibal Lecter Loves Will Graham, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Not Beta Read, Not Canon Compliant, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:20:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27927415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darkestri/pseuds/Darkestri
Summary: Hannibal asks Will to marry him, and with Jack's pursuit, Will finds himself more conflicted than ever.Set before the S2 finale.
Relationships: Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter
Comments: 6
Kudos: 124





	1. The Ring

They sit at the dinner table, both basking in each other's company. Tonight the lights in Hannibal's home felt warmer. The dinner was more elaborate, and the other man's gaze even softer. He spoke in hushed tones to Will. It was a sight to behold. That is, to see Hannibal's whole demeanor warm so thoroughly at the sight of himself. Yet, Hannibal was the same as he ever was. Only with him did Hannibal allow himself to relax completely.

Normally, Hannibal held a cold air to his figure. Professionality never escaped him in the slightest. But now, Will could see the man behind the veil. Coldness seeped into violence and brutality, but there was a deep beauty that lurked past all the layers. The Chesapeake Ripper was not all that Hannibal Lecter was.

"I trust you enjoyed tonight's selection?" Hannibal asked. Will noticed as his lips edged upwards like he'd already known the answer to his question.

"You ask even though you know the answer to your question."

"It is only polite." Hannibal gathered up the remaining plates from the table before he disappeared into the kitchen.

"And you abhor rudeness," Will stated. He raised his voice instead of following. Perhaps that action should be considered rude. Though Hannibal always had made an exception to ignore rudeness when it came to himself.

Hannibal returned with a bottle of wine in hand. He uncorked it before filling two empty glasses. Hannibal placed one of them near Will. He stayed near as Will brought it to his lips. Hannibal's left hand graced Will's shoulder as he completed his action. "This is a 1947 Cheval Blanc. A perfect mix between Cabernet Franc and Merlot."

"You waste your expensive wines on me, Dr. Lecter. I can't say I can tell the difference between cheap and expensive."

"Your problem lies with your technique. Wine tasting involves the usage of all the senses. Allow me to demonstrate for you." Hannibal raised his glass and swirled it. "First, you must look and swirl the wine. Allow the aroma to release itself into the air." He brought the wine glass to his face. Will's attention immediately sharpened like he'd been caught in a rather strong current. "Next, Will, you smell the wine." Hannibal drew air into his lungs, much louder than normal. "The last step is to taste the wine and allow it to sit on the tongue before swallowing." Then Hannibal brought the glass to his lips and sipped. He stood in silence for a moment before Will watched his Adam's apple bob gently.

Will smirked in silence as his gaze locked with Hannibal's. He moved to repeat the doctor's actions. When he finished, his smirk widened. "While I enjoyed your presentation, I can't say I taste any difference when trying it out for myself."

"With time, your palette will develop, I assure you." Deep amusement colored his features. Will wondered if his face reflected the same. "Shall we move into the other room? I started a fire earlier in the day, and I imagine it to be a fine way to end the night."

Will stood from his seat as he trailed in Hannibal's steps. It was then that Will realized Hannibal's actions had an ulterior motive outside of his usual. Tonight had been too sensual--too entrenched with niceties. The atmosphere, while pleasant, held a quiet desperation.

Nervous. Hannibal was nervous.

Hannibal pat the space beside him. Will placed himself on a plush couch near the fire. They gazed at the fire for what seemed like an eternity. Their silence took on a loudness only outshined by the faint ticking of a clock.

Their plan to thwart Jack had been put into action. With the death of Randal Tier and the supposed death of Freddy Lounds, Jack was gearing up to catch Hannibal red-handed. He expected Will to go along with the plan, but Will had found himself doubting his decisions as of late. Will knew he had yet to make a decision as to which side he'd stand on.

Hannibal did not know that Freddy Lounds was alive and well. He did not know that the meat he'd brought to him was leftover remains of Randal Tier. He did not know of the betrayal that Will was trying to conceal. So, what had Hannibal on edge tonight?

"Your silence is beginning to worry me, Hannibal," Will broke the silence. His sanity depended on it. The thoughts in his head were becoming too unbearable to ignore as the other man decided to keep his thoughts to himself.

"I find myself, for the first time in quite a while, unable to voice my thoughts." Will noticed an object in Hannibal's hand. It was poorly concealed against the leg farthest from his line of sight. "My compassion for you is inconvenient, Will."

"It's hard to be compassionate toward a cow," Will huffed. A hand found itself on his cheek. Will's breath quickened at the intimate contact. Hannibal was-- "Oh," he breathed.

"I think you misunderstand me." Hannibal settled a small black box between them. He used his other hand to open it. He did not lower himself down on one knee, but Will knew he would if asked.

Will was stuck in a perpetual nightmare of shock. He had seen the signs, but he'd never thought the events would play out to this. Inside the box laid a silver ring. It wasn't over extravagant, and it held no diamond. Under the glow of the fire, it shone brilliantly. Hannibal had seemed to catch on that Will was not interested in the monetary value of most things.

"I don't know what to say," Will's voice tremored. He reached for the ring, feeling the smoothness of the metal. He thought to place it on his finger, but a voice in his head argued against it.

Hannibal snapped the box closed as if to bar Will from placing the ring back into the box. "Words could never describe how deeply I feel for you."

"Is this…a proposal, Hannibal?"

"For clarity's sake, it is. I wish to keep you at my side for as long as time will allow." A thumb brushed over Will's lips. It trailed over the contour of his face, down to settle into the crook of his neck. Will heard himself sigh. A wash of calm and comfort drifted over his being. "Keep the ring with you. I won't ask for your decision now."

An icy frost settled in Will's stomach as Hannibal extracted his touch. Still, Will could not bring himself to utter a single word of approval or denial. The shrill cry of conflict whirled behind his eyes as he stared down at the ring in his hand. Hannibal's touch returned to close Will's hand around the ring. "Again, you need not answer now."

"It's awfully generous of you. Why me? Your relationship with Alana, I thought--"

"My relationship with Alana was nothing if not out of convenience. Never have I felt so understood by another person than I have with you, Will."

"I--but Marriage, Hannibal?" I can't. The words failed to reach past Will's lips as his eyes locked with Hannibal's. Whether the other man understood his silent plea, Will didn't know. He sensed a wall growing between them, preparation for rejection, or worse.

"Think about it." Hannibal's weight left the couch. His voice carried from the edge of the room as he further distanced himself. A soft, Goodnight, Will reached his ears.

Will sat alone in front of a dying fire. He grabbed his coat and fled out the front door not long after. The ring still clutched in the palm of his hand.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't meant to be very long, and it reads like a bad soap opera. I'm having a good time writing it, though. Please enjoy. :)

Jack called in the early hours of the morning. The events of last night still waged war in Will's mind. The ring laid safe in his coat pocket as he traveled to the crime scene. Some part of him wanted to keep it close.

"What do we have, Jack?"

"A man in his thirties with his chest cracked open like a fucking egg." Jack's face was grim, and Will knew he suspected the Ripper.

"Ripper victim?"

"It's your job to find out, Graham." Jack lingered for a moment more. He lowered his voice, "Where are we with…" Jack gestured vaguely.

"Not far."

"It's been two weeks. We can't keep Lounds in protection for much longer."

"I know." Will rubbed a hand over his face. The situation with Hannibal had grown too complicated, and Will sensed an emotional obligation where there shouldn't be one. "He's not giving me much to go on, Jack"

Will had begun to believe he wasn't nailed down to either side of the fence. He evaded Jack's questions frequently, and Hannibal's even more. Everything that made its way past his lips were lies. All lies.

"Nothing?" Jack faltered. "You were so sure before. What happened?"

"Nothing happened."

Jack left him to examine the crime scene.

Will returned to Baltimore later that night. On accident, mind you. Will hadn't realized where he ended up until he pulled up into Hannibal's driveway. Will considered pulling away before he was noticed. Facing Hannibal so soon after felt like an impossibility.

The front door opened and Will cursed to himself before shutting off the engine. "Will?" Hannibal called as he approached.

"I don't know why I'm here. I don't know when I decided to come either," Will laughed. He turned his head toward the floor to conceal a smile.

Hannibal placed a cool hand to Will's forehead. "No fever. I don't believe you're in danger of a relapse."

"That's good, I guess." Will allowed Hannibal to take his coat, and they migrated to the kitchen. Hannibal had several pots simmering on the stove. His stomach growled at the thought of food. "Were you expecting me?"

"I could only hope, though I did not expect to see you so soon." Hannibal didn't press for more information. Will imagined he wouldn't bring up the events of last night himself. For that, Will relaxed.

He wanted to enjoy the other man's company without plaguing his thoughts with marriage. He hadn't even thought about Hannibal in that way. Sure, their relationship was more intimate that most, and Will felt more at ease in his company that he was in anyone else's. However, does that constitute a proposal? Was he really so dense?

"I received your message," Will said. Hannibal cocked his eyebrow in acknowledgment, but he didn't affirm anything. Caution preceded Hannibal despite everything. "It was…artistic."

"In what way would you call it artistic?" Hannibal uncorked a bottle of wine, moving to pour its contents into two glasses.

"There was beauty in the flowers. The victim's heart was missing, but it was removed with gentle precision. The Ripper took care with this piece." Will accepted a glass from Hannibal. He suspected Hannibal was taking great pleasure in Will's recount of the crime scene. "It felt as if you were proposing to me a second time."

"And your answer?"

"I don't have one yet."

"I see." Hannibal leaned against the side of the island-counter. "You're asking me for a great deal of patience."

"If you expected an answer straight away, you wouldn't have given me an option to think on it." Will joined the spot beside him, making sure to retain some distance between them.

"Indeed, but I find myself eager for a positive response. It is only natural."

"Everyone hopes for a positive response when they propose." Will sipped his drink.

"You've yet to deny my request."

"I find myself conflicted in more ways than I can count." Will stared down at the pristine floor. While Hannibal was considerably dressed down in this instance, his brown dress shoes contrasted with the white of the floor.

"We could disappear now. Tonight. Feed your dogs, leave a note for Alana and never see her or Jack again. Almost polite."

"That'd make this our last supper." Will glanced up to find Hannibal's eyes glued to his form.

"Of this life. I'm serving lamb."

"Sacrificial."

"I freely claim my sin. I don't need a sacrifice. Do you?" Hannibal turned to face him fully now. The action was almost confrontational, but it was nonetheless non-threatening.

"I need him to know." Will gripped the counter as anxiety bubbled in his veins. "If I confessed to him right now, do you think he'd forgive me?"

"I would forgive you." Hannibal's voice was soft again. It was so soft and caring like he was begging Will to make the right decision. "If Jack were to tell you all is forgiven, would you accept his forgiveness?"

"He wants to know the truth. See who you are. Who I've become." Will paused. This conversation wasn't about Jack. No, somehow Hannibal had found out the truth. Did he know Freddy Lounds was alive? Was he offering his forgiveness? Would Hannibal willingly found their relationship on a bed of lies?

Will couldn't do that. He refused to introduce instability into something already unstable. His face heated up. It was strange to be so upset over something so typical of the other man. "Is this the reason you proposed to me? Manipulation?"

"Mano širdis, never." Hannibal cupped the side of Will's face. While the action was soothing, Will found no comfort in the action.

"Then, why?" Will wanted to rip himself away and flee to the other side of the room. "God, you can't keep doing this shit to me, Hannibal!"

"It was not my intention to upset you, Will. I apologize." Hannibal withdrew himself, and Will instantly felt worse for wear. It was confusing to desire and resent another person so passionately. If he were the same Will a week ago, Will thought he might have gone for another murder attempt.

He gingerly set his wine glass onto the counter, hoping his anger was well concealed. However, there was a slight tremor in his hand. Hannibal could take it as he will. "I shouldn't have come here tonight. I should go."

Will started for the breezeway not giving Hannibal a chance to respond to his declaration. Hannibal followed closely behind. Will grappled with his coat a bit too roughly and the silver ring tumbled out of his pocket. Will stalled and his heart clenched in his chest.

"My actions were not constituted for the purpose of manipulation. I truly care for you, Will." Hannibal lifted the ring from its place on the floor. He returned it to Will. "I regret this to be the end of our night together."

"Goodnight, Hannibal."


	3. Thereafter

He held the ring in his hands, examining its features. It was simple yet stunning. Brilliant, yet it held a darker meaning to it.

Will checked the time. Tonight was the night of the dinner. He and Jack would arrive around seven, the moment where Will would decide whose side he'd really take.

He longed to run away with Hannibal, but the pressure of doing the right thing grated at Will. He should turn Hannibal in. He should help Jack achieve this. He wanted to do the right thing.

No, he didn't. Fuck, all he really wanted was to have the freedom to live comfortably. He wanted to be released from responsibility's grasp.

He wanted to say yes. However, there's one small issue in this plan. Will had betrayed the other man's trust. It was unfair that a deep sense of guilt tugged at his core--after all of the turmoil Hannibal had brought him.

Will's phone buzzed.

* * *

He stood in the driveway of Hannibal's home. His person was empty of any firearm or weapon. Bloodstained his face and hands, and the rain worked to wash as much of it away as it could. Though, he was sure it would permanently stain his car seat.

He spotted Alana just outside the front door. She was alive but severely injured. "Will," she choked.

"Alana," Will's voice sounded flat. He didn't stop for small talk, determined to reach Hannibal.

The entryway was silent. Will feared the worst as he rounded the corner that led into the kitchen. He found Abigail there. When he and Hannibal had spoken about teacups and time, Will didn't expect this. When it came to Hannibal, the death of Abigail had soured the core of their relationship. How could he trust the person who'd taken such an important person away? But now…now Abigal was here. She was safe beside the obvious distress that lined her expression. "Abigail?"

"I didn't know what to do. I just…did what he told me to."

"Will," Hannibal spoke now. His shirt was stained pink like Will's.

"You were supposed to leave…" Will stepped closer to Hannibal.

Hannibal brought his hands up to Will's cheeks. "We couldn't leave without out you."

Will raised his left hand to cover one of the hands-on his face. He met the other man's gaze as it flickered to his ring finger. "We should learn to communicate better," Will breathed.

"I wanted to surprise you, but you wanted to surprise me as much as I did." Will saw the knife in Hannibal's hand as he was held closer. Hannibal was making a decision, and he suspected he would be powerless to sway the outcome. "Tell me, Will. Did you believe you could change me?"

"You wanted to keep me by your side so bad that you went as far as to propose to me." Will rested his head in the crook of Hannibal's neck. He braced himself for the hot edge of a knife tearing through skin. "I already did."

The knife didn't come as fast as he'd anticipated. Will continued, "You didn't require a sacrifice of me, but I still felt like it was necessary. Forgive me, Hannibal."

"I'm afraid there is nothing to forgive."

In all honesty, Will wasn't sure what he felt for the man beside him. He was unused to the love and affection Hannibal rained down on him. His previous partners had never stuck around for long. His empathy always seemed to drive them away. Yet, with Hannibal, his empathy only drove him closer to Will.

Marriage had been a faraway thought to Will for a long time. His unsuccessful attempt to court Alana had put him off of love for a while. The proposal from Hannibal had been more than a shock as he'd never suspected to play for the other team. Will hadn’t given a romantic relationship between them much thought, let alone marriage. Their intense connection to one another showed the capacity for love. There was only one way to find out. "Kiss me?"

"My darling, Will. Are you sure?" Hannibal leaned in close to Will. Both of his hands caressed the sides of his face. Will could feel Hannibal's breath on his skin. He nodded once, and that's all it took for Hannibal to close the gap between them.

The kiss wasn't spectacular. Fireworks did not burst off in the distance, but it held a languid passion. Hannibal's lips grazed against Will's. His touch was careful and slow. He sensed Hannibal did not want to overstep his boundaries. Will braced himself against Hannibal's shoulders urging him to relax.

Will pulled away with reluctance. He turned to Abigail, a smile graced her lips. "We should leave before they get here. I assume you had a plan?"

Hannibal reeled Will back in for a second kiss. Will's eyes fluttered closed, unable to stop himself from becoming lost. "I do, but first, we have a stop to make."

Will had always admired Bedelia's home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! I'm not the best writer on the block, but I hope you enjoyed this little brain child all the same! :)


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